{"id":1749,"date":"2024-03-13T12:05:42","date_gmt":"2024-03-13T12:05:42","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/realmsofdespair.com\/wordpress\/?page_id=1749"},"modified":"2024-03-13T12:05:42","modified_gmt":"2024-03-13T12:05:42","slug":"cry-of-despair-10","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/realmsofdespair.com\/index.php\/cry-of-despair-10\/","title":{"rendered":"Cry of Despair #10"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

In which we read Stories from the Bloodbath<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
\n                                                               .---.\n                                                              \/  .  \\\n                                                             |\\_\/|   |\n                                                             |   |  \/|\n  .----------------------------------------------------------------' |\n \/  .-.     __                        ___                            |\n|  \/   \\   \/ ()  ,_          _  |\\   (|  \\  _  ,        _,  o  ,_    |\n| |\\_.  | |     \/  | |  |   \/ \\_|\/    |   ||\/ \/ \\_ |\/\\_\/ |  | \/  |   |\n|\\|  | \/|  \\___\/   |\/ \\\/|\/  \\_\/ |_\/  (\\__\/ |_\/ \\\/  |_\/ \\\/|_\/|\/   |\/  |\n| `---' | -------------(|-------|)----------------(|---------------  |\n|   L   | Editor : Mystaric  |     #10    Jun. 6,1999    Vol. 1      |\n|       | Printer: Bede      |                         |             |\n|       |      [Staff]       | Feature                 | _________   |\n|   I   | Anaisse  Apollonia | Poems\/Stories           || *  *  * |  |\n|       | Cyniq    Dacoit    | Funny Bones             ||         |  |\n|       | Conran   Deevlit   | Guilds\/Orders           | \\   ^   \/   |\n|       | Keroppi  Kuah      | Quest Central           |  \\ \/ \\ \/    |\n|   S   | Louellin Mea       | Classified             o=o  \\ I \/     |\n|       | Ranstlin Thabo     | Announcements           I    \\_\/      |\n|       | Tunclon  Vestia    | Letters to Editor       *             |\n|       | Romanu             |                         *            \/\n|   T   |----------------------------------------------------------'\n\\       |\n \\     \/\n  `---'\n  ______ ______ ______   ______ ______ ______ ______ _______ ______ ______\n |   (__   () |   _)  \\ |   ---|  \\___|    . |_    _|     | |   () |  \\___|\n |______)______;______\/ |____| |______;____|_| |__| |_______;___|\\_\\______;\n -------------------- The Cry of Despair Feature Story --------------------\n\n..:!:..Getting Froggy With It..:!:..\n-----------------------------------------------------------------\n     ()-()    This is what shows up when you check Calis - The Hoopy\n   .-(___)-.  Frood's (and no, I didn't spell it wrong, I checked it out)\n    _<>_   personal bio (HOP HOP). This hard working Immortal can\n    \\\/   \\\/   be likened to the mythical Dr. Frankenstein, because he\n              is hard at work building the 'better' 'bigger' 'meaner'\nmonster for the Realms.\n\n     Calis has been working to improve his Shapeshifter, the only mob\nof its type in the game.  It actually changes its form randomly, becoming,\nat any given time one, of six mobs.\n\nCalis invokes The Shapeshifter!\n\n    The Shapeshifter skulks about here, looking for a fight...\n    The Shapeshifter is shrouded in flowing shadow and light.\n    The Shapeshifter is surrounded by cascading torrents of energy.\n    The Shapeshifter is ensphered by shards of glistening ice.\n\n     This is the Shapeshifter in its most basic form, but wait a moment.\n\n     \"It not only shifts names, and both short and long descriptions, but\nalso the immunes, resistances, attacks and defenses change,\" says Calis.\n\n  The Shapeshifter takes a swig out of a hipflask...\n  The shapeshifter starts shimmering with a green aura.\n  The Shapeshifter shimmers with energy as a glow encompasses them...\n\n  A sleek black wolf rests on its powerful haunches.\n  Hugo the Shapeshifter is shrouded in flowing shadow and light.\n  Hugo the Shapeshifter is surrounded by cascading torrents of energy.\n  Hugo the Shapeshifter is ensphered by shards of glistening ice.\n\n  Hugo the Shapeshifter takes a swig out of a hipflask...\n  The shapeshifter starts shimmering with a green aura.\n  Hugo the Shapeshifter shimmers with energy as a glow encompasses them...\n\n  A giant golem stands here, looking for a fight.\n  Kronk the Shapeshifter shimmers beneath an aura of dark energy.\n  Kronk the Shapeshifter is surrounded by cascading torrents of energy.\n  Kronk the Shapeshifter is ensphered by shards of glistening ice.\n\nThese are just three of the six forms the Shapeshifter morphs into.\nThe programming required for this mob is extremely extensive.\n\n     \"For example,a typical mob's program is maybe 1 or 2 pages long.\nThis so far is about 6 pages long, and I want to double it,\" says Calis.\n\nCalis has been an Immortal for about a year and a half, and\nquite appropriately, he gained that status on Halloween.  He\nstarted off with the Quest Council, but because of the stress\nfrom dealing with complaints, problems and hastles of trying to\nprovide quests for Mortals, he left and began doing mostly admin-\nistrative tasks.\n\n     \"I do run occasional quests still but no where near the amount\nI used to (which was every day or every other day),\" Calis says.\n\"Everytime you run a quest you cannot please everyone.  Most of\nmy building is with mobs. I am good with programs.\"\n\n     Calis continues, \"My mobs are not easy, ever. They require\nteamwork, brains, and an analytical approach to killing it. A helter\nskelter approach where everyone attacks will NEVER work. I get\naccused of making my mobs too hard and some say you have to be mega buff.\nThat is not true. If you work together, and work as a team, they\nare all very killable.\"\n\n    Like most Immortals Calis misses the old days, but occassionaly gets\nto roam the realms as a mortal.  He knows many hard core battlers are\nalways looking for the next BIG mob to take down. Chances are they will\none day find themselves face to face with one of Calis's \"Frankensteins\".\n     By Vestia, Duchess of Waterlord -- Pixie Extraordinaire\n\nMOST\n\n\nInterview with the Leader of the Guild of Warriors\n\nQ: How long have you been leading the GoW?\n\nSelina: I think it's been about 6 months now.\n\nQ: What first made you think you wanted to be the leader of GoW?\n\nSelina: Well, to be honest, I was talked into being second of the guild.\nI had no idea at that time what to do. I asked tons of questions and\nspoke to a lot of people to learn.\n\nQ: How long had you been a guild member at that point?\n\nSelina: About 5 months.\n\nQ: Did you have any idea of what you were getting yourself into when you\nbecame second?\n\nSelina: I knew it would be alot of work, but I like to help people, so I\nwas willing to try it.\n\nQ: What do you feel is one of the main things you've accomplished as Leader\nof the GoW?\n\nSelina: I can't say I have done anything by myself, the whole guild has\ngotten involved and got the councils up and running. A lot of people are\nvery active and I couldn't keep things running without them.\n\nQ: Ok, then what have been some of the major positive changes that have\nhappened under your current leadership? The councils?\n\nSelina: I would have to say the councils, all have active members, it\ngets the guild involved in many different activities and makes gives us\nfun stuff to do :) People weren't really involved before, everyone did\ntheir own thing. Now, we do it as a group.\n\nQ: So would you say your style of leadership emphasizes the Brotherhood\naspect of the GoW?\n\nSelina: I hope so :) That's the most important aspect of the guild.\nTo me..that's why you join the guild, to be a part of something, to be\nin a family.\n\nQ: Where do you see the GoW going in the near future? Any visions for\nits growth you would like to share with the CoD readers?\n\nSelina: We are currently working on having an activity for the guild\neach night of the week. Basically, to get everyone involved in something\nwould be the ideal.\n\nQ: What sorts of activities?\n\nSelina: Two pkills per week, trivia night, quest night, and runs on the\nremaining nights. :) Especially the quests, it's something for the\nnon-avs to get involved in.\n\nQ: If you had to pick one thing to say to a potential GoW recruit if they\nwanted to maximize their chances of getting in the guild, what would\nit be?\n\nSelina: Be respectful to all people, show patience and persistance and\nmost of all a caring attitude toward your fellow warriors.\n\nSelina says 'and to hug everyone :)'\nSelina says 'we hug in the guild :)'\n\nBy Romanu\n\nLookIng for clues Try thE funny bones.\n\n                            ________________________________\n                           \/     , _                       \/\\\n       .      .'          |     \/|\/ \\ _   _          ,    |_\/\n        :`...' `.,'  '    |      |__\/\/ \\_|\/ \/|\/|\/|  \/ \\_  |\n    `.  ' .**.  ; ; ':     \\     |   \\_\/ |_\/ | | |_\/ \\\/    \\\n    ` ``:`****,'  .' :      \\                               \\\n  ..::.  ``**\":.''   `.      |                              \\|\/\n.:    `: ; `,'        :      |       _,         _|          \\||\/\n  `:    `   :         ;      |      \/ |  \/|\/|  \/ |           \\||\/\n    :   :   :        ;      \/       \\\/|_\/ | |_\/\\\/|_\/        \/\\||\/\n    :    :   :     .:      |                               |  \\||\/\n     :    :   :..,'  ``::. |                               |  \\||\/\n      `....:..'  ..:;''     \\                               \\  \\||\/\n      .:   . ...::::         |   () _|_  _   ,_  o  _  ,     | \\||\/\n     ,'''''``:::::::         |   \/\\  |  \/ \\_\/  | | |\/ \/ \\_   |  \\||\/\n               `::::         |  \/(_) |_\/\\_\/    |\/|\/|_\/ \\\/    |  \\||\/\n                 `::.        \/                               |    \\|\n                  `::     __\/___________________________    \/     ||\n           . ,.    ::::' \/    ,..                      \/   \/       |\n         .'.'  ``.  ::   \\  .'.. `.                    \\__\/        '\n        '        .: ::    ,'.'     .--------------------'\n      .' ,'    .::::::   ,.'    .:::.\n    .' .'  ..:'     ::: .,   .;'\n\n\nStories from the Bloodbath.\n\nPacing restlessly around the Cathedral, I grew weary of the sounds of the\nechoes of my footsteps following me and went in search of new sport.\n\nWandering east of Darkhaven, I spotted a little used path branching off to\nthe southeast. Curiousity drew me in, and I followed the path,\nmeandering along it's almost overgrown track until it turned east.\nSmiling to myself, I crept past two vicious guards and slipped into the\nunwary town. It was almost too easy, for they all rushed about madly on\ntheir own errands, heedless of my presence.\n\nA chorus of young voices caught my attention and I felt my fangs grow in\nresponse to the thought of the taste of their young, sweet blood.\nLicking my lips, I crept into the schoolroom. Toys littered the floor\nwhile drawings of gears and levers decorated the walls. Small children\nsat at their desks deep in thought, while a bespectacled harriden held\nthem in thrall as she taught Physics.\n\nStepping forward, I caught her eyes with mine and gave her a reassuring\nsmile. I extended my hand to her, as if in invitation to dance.\nPowerless to resist my will, she stepped forward, her small hand coming\nup to rest in mine. Spinning her about to face her charges, I caressed\nher cheek, pushing her head to the side and tucking a loose curl behind\ner ear. Smiling cruelly, I delicately traced a razor-sharp fingernail\nlong the graceful curve of her neck to where her blood coursed closest\nto the surface, pulsing in time with the beating of her heart.\n\nMouth quirking with amusement, I raised my eyes to those of the children\nand drew my nail across her jugular vein, letting the blood spray in a\nfountain. White shocked eyes stared at me from gore splattered faces as\nthe old womans feet beat a rapid staccato against my shins. Casting the\nying woman from me, I strode towards the whimpering children. Cupping\nhe boys rosy cheeks in my palms, I dashed their heads together,\nlittering the room with skull fragments and brains. Smiling at the\nlittle girl, I perched myself on a desk, and cuddled her into my lap.\nPulling the braids away from her small neck, I began to feed.. her\nyoung sweet blood tainted with the smoky taste of fear.\n\nThus was my experience in Shattered Refuge\nUnknown\n\n\nJibberish by Thulkinn Krogenstar (The Insane Mage)\n\nOnce upon some cottage cheese,\nI ran into some giant fleas,\nFleas be nimble, fleas be quick,\nSatan Rides a Pogo Stick!\n\nClouds are sad, and eggplants die.\nSaid a siamese midget fly.\nCome with me, come and see,\nWe'll watch the sunrise from beneath the sea.\nBut for now I have to flee.\nAnd flee he did, or did he Flea?\nAsked the dragon when he spoke to me.\n\nAnd Elvis said, with a swastika on his head,\nMy steed named Ed, is dead on the bed.\nAnd under the hood of my Yugo there stood,\nPamela Lee, since she looked so good.\nMy ears went out for a walk yester-night,\nThey grew wings, and grew flight.\nSo I lent my ears, to a pixie's plight.\nWhich to all the world was Jibberish!\n\n  ______ ____ _ ______ ______ ______  ___\n |    __|    | |      |      |   | | |   |__ ______ ______ ______ _______\n |___|  |______;____|_;____|_;___  | |    . |    ) |      |  \\___|(_   (_`\n--- funny - bones --------- |______| |______;______;____|_;______|__)____)\n\nFunny Titles\n\n[(Link Dead)] Glorv the DT'd liquered up warrior is standing here.\nZerbry, another nameless soldier looking for his destiny.\nKardain opens up a can of blank scrolls on ya!.\nGolan Failed a Math Test! *flex* [GoW].\nSagashi. *note on back* Kick Me! |RR|IGKF|MaP|IT-T|.\nAnakah wields the last thing you'll ever see....\nKuah Cha'Din, Inked and pierced in all the wrong places.\nTryder is depriving a village of an idiot  .\nLotem i am not ignoreing you. i am just too lazy to repl.\nTucansam StarProfit says 'Follow your nose!' is hovering here.\nJari Litmanen, killing in the name of Debbie Gibson.\nBrezhan to know me is to...what was the question?.\nAjax: Phase 1: Underpants. Phase 3: Profit.\nNixen is Not a Crook. (Order of Inconnu)\n\n\nFunny Titles Summited by YOU!\n\nFrom Axius\n    Avatar          Gene-sis... if I could only get my hands on one....\n\n\nTries at Limericks\n\nThe fool who saw Shimmergloom's teeth\nDecided to make like a thief\nSo drunk on his gin\nHe attacked with a grin\nHe's now marked by the grave he's beneath\nAlieron\n\n\nThere once was a pixie named Lynn\nWho really was terribly thin\nand when she was made\nto drink lemonade\nshe slipped threw the straw and fell in.\nKyden\n\n\nOrun the Smithy \nThe smithy in town here named Orun\nHas a life that's seldom borin'\nHe bends and he bashes\nIn flying hearth ashes\nAnd adventurers keep bringing him more\n\nTwenty-four hours each day\nWith no vacation pay\nThey come with narry a 'Thanks'\nThe newbies and the 'tanks'\nSo Orun has no time to play\n\nThrough magical portals they will come\nAnd even they will astral walk, some\nOr in off the street\nFly, float or on feet\nOrun never has time to sip rum\nby Greetmir Goodeguard\n\n\nClues clues and more clues wonder were they could be hiding\nPossibly with an apology.\n\nSocials that didn't quite make it\n\nTattle\nVestia points her fingers at you and shouts, \"OooOoo Player.\nI'm telling on you!\"\n\nVestia points her fingers at Player and shouts, \"OooOoo Player.\nI'm telling on you!\"\n\nYou point her finger at Player and threaten to tell everyone\nwhat they did\n**********************************************************\nVestia stomps around, ranting about telling someone something\nabout somebody. Don't make eye contact with her.\n\nYou are certain that you have something to tell about somebody.\nIf only you could remember what it is.\n************************************************************\nVestia runs up to everyone in the room shouting, \"I did it!\nI did it! It was me I tell ya!!\"\n\nZap\nYou run around trying to convince everyone of your guilt. Stupid!!\n\nYou pull out an ugly stick and zap Morihaus. Ewwwww. Maybe that was a bad\nidea.\n\nShingo pulls out an ugly stick and zaps Morihaus! Mirrors everywhere\nshatter!\n\nShingo pulls out an ugly stick and zaps you! You look like a wart an an\nogre's behind.\n\n************************************************************\nYou pull out an ugly stick and brandish it! In the name of Thoric, what\nhave you done?!\n\nShingo pulls out an ugly stick and brandishes it! You suddenly feel like\nan ugly freak. Oh wait, Shingo looks like an ugly freak too.\n************************************************************\nYou pull out an ugly stick and zap yourself. There seems to be no change.\nDid you run out of charges, perhaps?\n\nShingo pulls out an ugly stick and zaps himself. There is no change. Seems\nlike Shingo can't get any uglier.\n\n  ______ ______ ___ ___    ______  ______   ______ ______ ______\n |   () |    | |   |   |__|   _) \\(_   (_  |    . |      |   _) \\\n |___   ;______;___;______;______\/__)____) |____|_;____|_;______\/\n |______|  ______ ______ ______ ______ ______  ______\n          |   () |   () |   _) \\  \\___|   () |(_   (\n_________ |______|___|\\_\\______\/______;___|\\_\\__)____) _____________\n\nGoT News\nThe Guild of Thieves would like to say farewell, goodluck and best\nwishes to Wilhelmina. She retired from GM this week, and we will miss\nher dearly. Elisabet has stepped up to be the new Guild Master, and\nBelmore is now the new Guild First. We are currently holding guild\nnominations and elections for our new Guild Second.\nGood luck to those currently questing for membership.\n\nGoP News\nThe GoP welcomes Zyboria, Golga , Traxxis, Dresduvay, and Tynia\n\nHidden News\nOnly if you can brandish it!\n\nQuest Central\nOpen Quests\n\nHidden Contest, there is a hidden contest within the paper\nFollow the directions.  Mud mail a note in the following format:\n\nName:  \nGuild: \nAnswer:\n\nIf there are items in the answer please have all items in a bag\nwith a note with your name.  Multiple bags will be accepted\nEntries must be in before Thursday June 10th.\n\nQuest Results\nBoggle Quest from Issue 8\n\nWinners:\nZephranix  65 points\nAleara     20 Points\nAshiana    20 Points\n\nScoring:\nThe number of words from all entries is averaged. Entries that fall below \nThe average is dropped (Average number of words 46).  From the remaining \nentries points are awarded as followed:\n\nMost words                               25 Points\nEach Unique word (words no one else has) 20 Points\nQuest Participation                       5 Points\n\nScores:\nMost words - Zephranix 72 words\nUnique Words Zephranix (2 unique) Aleara (1 unique), ashiana (1 unique)\n\nParticipants:\nAkael Aleara Alexian Aoede Arendahl Ashiana Brane Ceirana Dendraxx \nDrake Elisabet Feyd Fobertron Grandak Janel Jermyn Jezabyliayzy\nKaiowas Leala Leaman Loralanza Mariyah Preia Qenaralin Raginzari\nRanthor Sanin Shingo Tasarok Thulkinn Tyran Xantryke Xysma Zanardi  \nZephranix Zwanth\n\n   ______ ____   ______ _______ _______ ___ ______ ___ ______ ______\n  |   (__`   |__|    . |(_   (_`(_   (_`   |    __|   |  \\___|   _) \\\n  |______)______|____|_|__)____)__)____)___;___|  |___;______;______\/\n  ----------------------Classifieds----------------------------------\n\n\nNo classified this week. Reminder to place a classified is free of charge!\n\nAnnouncements\nCongratulations to Lord Jago and Lady Wavin of Rol na Feinne on their\nexchanging of marital vows. May they find every happiness together.\n\nCongratulations also to Lady Lashina of Rol na Feinne on her Betrothal to\nCommander Kabath. Our best wishes go to them for a long and happy life\ntogether.\n\n\nThe CoD has a new public board for you to post suggestions and ideas for\nthe paper.  The board is located in our New Front Office which is located\ne,s,u,u,s,w,s from dh[].\n\n\nApplications for the CoD are now closed.\n\nLetters to the Editor\nPOTIONSSTAVESSALVESWANDSPOTIONSSTAVESSALVESWANDSPOTIONSSTAVESSALVES \n\nLetters to the Editor\n\nDear CoD,\n    This letter is in regards to the story in funny bones last week.\nYou gave no credit what so ever to the true author of this story.\nAll you did was change the names of the adventures in it.\nYou could of atleast mentioned that Monty Python wrote this skit and gave\nthem some credit.\n\n                       Yours in stealth,\n                         Solomen [TM-Captain] [GoT]\n \n\nThank you Solomen,\nThe CoD would is sorry for printing a quest entry that was not unique and\noriginal.  I myself did have knowledge of the origin of the article before\nit was published, I am sorry and take full responsibility for its printing.\n\nMystaric - Editor, CoD\nSearching for answers?  The guilds and orders have a line.\n\n\nPOTIONSSTAVESSALVESWANDSPOTIONSSTAVESSALVESWANDSPOTIONSSTAVESSALVES<\/pre>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
In which we read Stories from the Bloodbath .—. \/ . \\ |\\_\/| | | | \/| .—————————————————————-‘ | \/ .-. __ ___ | | \/ \\ \/ () ,_ _ |\\ (| \\ _ , _, o ,_ | | |\\_. | | \/ | | | \/ \\_|\/ | ||\/ \/ \\_ |\/\\_\/…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"parent":0,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"page-templates\/full-width.php","meta":{"footnotes":"","_members_access_role":[],"_members_access_error":""},"class_list":["post-1749","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/realmsofdespair.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/1749","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/realmsofdespair.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/realmsofdespair.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/realmsofdespair.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/realmsofdespair.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1749"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/realmsofdespair.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/1749\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1757,"href":"https:\/\/realmsofdespair.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/1749\/revisions\/1757"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/realmsofdespair.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1749"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}