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Interviews: Thoric and Hoerkin! Bot Debate! Tried and Proven Worthy!




Mortal Staff:
Alendil, Alerious, Alisia, Apollonia, Azrakare, Barentin, Begaria,
Conran, Dein, DekkatH, Elaria, Elbanon, Goomra, Laine, Lorel, Nimue,
Nitsuj, Odessyus, Saraphin, Sarig, Shamisen, Shingo, Thalasian,
Mortal Editor: Kuah

Immortal Staff:
Elisabet, Lascivias
Immortal Editor: Ayesh
Table of Contents

Desk of the Editor
Letters, Words and Thanks.

An Interview with Thoric
The Immortal Ranger returns to the CoD!

The Bots/Botting Debate!
Strong Opinions from BOTH sides!

Eclipse (part 2)
The two continue on this grand adventure.

Meet Hoerkin
A quick chat with the immortal, Hoerkin

Quest and Contest
Winners, and announcements...

Turalyon sleeps with the Tuna fishies.
Yes, another Begaria story

Funny Bones
Titles, things said and captured and an interview with... Ogrillon?

Public Submitted
The Story of Cadimus

Desk of the Editor By: Kuah

What is the good word? We have one of the better issues ever this time
around that is packed with things many of you have requested and a lot
of hard work from the staff of the Cry of Despair. A big thanks to all
the people out there who took the time to submit opinions on the whole
botting issue, and the article is a very interesting read because of
the strong opinions, on both sides, you all hold.

Thoric makes a return to the pages of the Cry of Despair, in an well
done interview done by Begaria and Shingo. Thanks to Thoric and to
Hoerkin as well for sharing time with us so we can share with you. And
I think there was something about golden tickets and a quest
announcement in the Quest and Contest section...

As always, if you have a comment, gripe or something you want to
submit to the Cry of Despair, you can reach us the CoD public board
in the TownHall (e,s,2u,s,w,s from DH[]) or south of Quills and
Parchments on Market Street. Or you can Mudmail me or Ayesh. As
always, enjoy and thanks.

An Interview with Thoric By: Begaria and Shingo

Supreme Entity...

Begaria: What gave you the inspiration to create this MUD?

Thoric: I got addicted to mudding in college. While I had been very
much into multiplayer online text games previous to college, most of
them cost money to play. MUDs were free, more immersive, much larger
and had a lot more players on them. Not only that, but you were playing
with people from all over the world. I was hooked, (and my grades
suffered). In the spring on 1994 I started working on my own mud code
that I was planning on making available to multiline BBS's... but
stopped working on it when I got a job at ComputerLink Online in the
summer of 1994.

While I was working on adding Internet functionality to their multiline
BBS, I setup my own mud using the Merc2.1 code (DikuMUD family) because
I didn't have ime to continue writting my own code from scratch, and to
get something up and going quickly. Once I had a mud up and running, I
started work on making it have all the features and functionality I
wanted in my own code, and had also experienced on the MUD I had played
the most called Mozart, which used SillyMUD code (also DikuMUD family).

Begaria: How and why did you learn to code?

Thoric: Around Christmas-time when I was eight, I was wandering around
a Canadian Tire store looking at the computers (C-64's and Vic-20's)
and the video game systems, when I saw a nerdy classmate of mine doing
something on one of the Vic-20 machines. I went over to see what he was
doing, and he was typing in a BASIC program. He program asked for my
name, and my favourite food, to which it replied, "Thank-you <name> for
answering my questions. To show my gratitude I will give you some
<favourite food>"  (This 8-year old nerdy kid was using words like

I was so impressed that within a couple minutes this kid was able to
make the computer do what he wanted it to do. I knew that someday I'd
be making my own video games instead of just playing them. I was hooked.
I spent the next year bugging my family to get me a computer and played
on one every chance I got. I hung out at Radio-Shack, I played on my
father's computer at work. He got me a book on BASIC programming And I
tinkered around on any computer I could get my hands on.

I finally got a computer of my own the next Christmas, and spent the
next few years tinkering and programming.  It took me ten years to get
away from BASIC and into real world programming languages, but it wasn't
until I started MUD programming that I started to learn some really
advanced programming concepts.

Begaria: When you created this MUD, did it start off slow or did you
have quite a few people hit the MUD at one time?

Thoric: It was the original intention to keep the MUD small and more
reserved for members of the BBS (ComputerLink Online). Also, at the
time, bandwith was very limited.

Once we got a leased-line Internet connection, I got the OK to make
the MUD public, and we also got it hooked up into the menu of several
other BBS, (running MajorBBS software) around the world.
The MUD was advertised over the newsgroups as well as some of the
MajorBBS forums. The users trickled in bit by bit, and within a few
months we started to become a respectable medium sized MUD.

Another factor was that no publicity is bad publicity. We had a bit
of an issue with the DikuMUD credits that caused a bit of fire on the
newsgroups and mailing lists. Though the credits were restored, it left
us a few enemies for a couple years, and made us a bit of a black-sheep
of MUDs. We worked hard to gain the respect of the MUD community, but
some never forgive and forget. Realms of Despair has done amazingly well
compared to other MUDs which have had several more years of being

Begaria: During the hype of the Reunion talks, people have been
wondering what attractions you'll have there, could you give us any
insights on some of the attractions?

Thoric: The main attraction of the Reunion (aside from meeting all your
online friends in person) is the Ontario Renaissance Festival.

Begaria: Can you explain to those who won't be going what the Ontario
Renaissance Festival is?

Thoric: It involves an outdoor festival that includes five stages of
performers, full-armor combat jousting, craft shops, food purveyors,
and non-stop entertainment.

Begaria: Are you going to buy some plane tickets and send them out to
people who are not going?

Thoric: I'm going to be fronting a lot of cash to get T-shirts (and
maybe other souvineers) invitations, renting a van for transportation
and appetizers at the Fox and Fiddle... not sure I can afford any plane

Begaria: How successful has the last few reunions been? Do you hope
that this reunion is going to top the last one?

Thoric: Last year's reunion was the first real planned reunion. In
previous years we tagged along with ComputerLink Online / Internet
Direct's summer picnic to which only a handful of RoD players

Last year we had over 70 people show up at the gates to Rennfest.
Unfortunately I was running around so much that I completely forgot to
get a group picture of all those 70 people (as well as a list of who
was there) We did get some pictures from the Fox and Fiddle. This year
we hope to be a lot more organized.

Begaria: How many people do you think will show up this year?

Thoric: we're hoping for at least 100. Going by the RSVP's there should
be around 120 people, but some have cancelled. We hope this will be the
best reunion yet, and that it will encourage more people to come to the
next one, especially it being the seventh year.

Shingo: Is there a place at the Festival where people can participate
in the festivities?

Thoric: What kind of participation?

Shingo: Like pie throwing, getting stuck in the gallows, participating
in skits, etc.

Thoric: I'm not too sure about that stuff... ;) I believe there are a
few interactive things to do. You can certainly talk to the people
meandering about... the King, the Queen, the village idiot, the singing
wenches, etc. There's meat on sticks, ales, beer, mead... merriment to
be had.

Begaria: Which do you prefer Thoric? Boxers or Briefs?

Thoric: briefs... need some support, you know?

We thank Thoric for taking the time to accept another interview by
the one and only paper, Cry of Despair.

To Bot or not to Bot... By: Kuah and Conran

Bots, the running of a character using triggers while there is no one
attending it, is not illegal in itself. However, bots are held to the
same rules as playing characters. See Laws regarding "staking" and
other applicable laws. The character is accountable for any act the
bot commits.

There are many of them now, be them personal brew bots to those that
have sparked this debate on almost any channel, any noteboard, and
any ear that was willing to listen. They cast spells, remove poisons,
and a few run ads for nations and other organizations now after a
spell request is made.

There is no denying the effort and time some of these bots have had
put into them. Many of us recall the full running casino Cyril had
going, all ran with bots. I myself like the fact that I can grab a
few portals full of heals from the many bots in DH when I'm in a pinch.
But still there are those who just see BOTS as more hassle than help.

I personally think that they've made a lot of newbies reluctant to
explore and find the things they need to max their stats. The eq and
items are out there if they'd go and look for them, but it is a lot
easier for them to walk to the academy instead. And then once the bots
are gone for a few hours, they dont know what to do - they dont want to
level for fear of messing up their base. And then their kindred wears
off and they cant get things out of their chest. While bots mean well,
I think that lowbies would probably be better of without them.

An argument made for the good of 'bots' would be they lesson the spam
on public and private channels asking for 'level spells'. Yet when the
bots are not online, the spam is replaced with new players asking where
'suchnsuch' is, like the bot is a part of the game itself.

...See that on chat? newbies are too dependent on bots. They panic when
they're not on. They(bots) make people too dependent, they overuse them,
so they never learn the hardness of people levelling before bots.

But is it the spam that really bothers people? Or is it the fact that
this is a new issue and resource that was not around when many of us
were leveling the first time ourselves.

I don't even like Tagetarle because no one learns to walk to areas.
Then when they reach level 20 they are 'Where is land of newts' etc.

I dislike bots, I think they cause far too many problems in relation to
their very limited usefulness.

And most of you are in the middle on the subject. What is wrong with
grabbing a quick remove poison spell from a bot if it is there to do
such a task?

Bots and Botting is a very tough subject, it is good to see those who
need the services they perform able to get the service, however... the
newer players don't seem to learn the ins and outs of the game when
these bots are so available, yes it cuts down on the spam asking on
public channels... It has improved greatly since the bots have been
moved off the beaten path also, but we need to teach the newbies how to
play more than just hand them what they need for max stats. After all
this game is about exploring and meeting new people and making friends
from around the world, a few of mine which I hope to meet this year at
Reunion 2000 ;)

I'm pretty neutral about the bot issue, some people like to make bots
some people like to use them. This is all good so long as it doesn't
interfere with others. One thing that I can't stand is bots that traffic
on timers though. Bots on channels = bad, imo. The merchant and gaming
bots are fine, I'm definitely against botting area pops and such though.

I think bots can be very helpful for those that have a hard time
obtaining heals/leveling spells, etc. However, I think it has taken a
lot of challenge out of the game for newer players, and caused
unnecessary spam for those who don't care for it.

I think bots have their place in the game, as long as they aren't
abused by other players. If bots are set up correctly and used for the
purposes they are designed for, then they work fine. The problem seems
to come when people try to abuse there purpose or try and steal from
them. Most people that set up bots that I've dealt with are honest
enough and will take care of any problems when they become aware of
them. Generally they aren't out to screw people over.

It's nice to see player involvment in the game like that. I'm not sure
if it helps the newer players or teaches them to rely on others for
what they need. Guess it depends on the player.

Bots have their uses, and can do automatic stuff that players probably
wouldn't want to spend 24 hours on. In the same vein, bots can't give
the manual touch live players do. :P But bots are okay, as long as they
aren't spammy.

And now the views of a bot owner, Nelkum, from an interview done by

When I first left the Spectral Gates in the hope of someday becoming
an avatar, I could hardly imagine that my journey would take more than
a year of real time. You see, even toward the end of that year, I was
still a newbie in many ways. What I really needed at the beginning was
that someone might trans(port) me a clue. I didn't know what effect
levelling spells had on levelling until I was almost at level 40. And
even then I didn't think much about maximizing my statistics. So here
I am, an avatar with a base of 440 hp, and a real chicken when it comes
to fighting. Then when I got zMUD I thought it would be easier to
advance my proteges Nelkus and Nelcus if I could spell them up by means
of a few triggers. But they really didn't need for me to stand by
their side the whole time, so I picked out a spot just east of Darkhaven
Square, and thought I might help others who happened by.

Within minutes I was chased out of town. So the next best location I
could find was just outside the Eastern gate.  But the guards kept
closing the gate, so I killed them. And that's how I became Darkhaven's
Original Drowbot.

When asked why he continues to run a bot, contrary to a widespread
opinion of anti-botting, his response...

I can't say that I fully understand the anti-bot position, but I doubt
that our opposition are uniform in their opinions.

Some people think there shouldn't be any bots at all, and I would tend
to disagree. Some think bots should relegate themselves to places where
they will never be seen, which obviously renders them useless. The more
reasonable position is that bots should not park themselves in
high-traffic areas and should not be excessively spammy. It's hard to
define things like "high-traffic areas" and "excessively spammy," but
in principle I agree these are things bots should try to avoid. But the
controversy has gotten out of hand at times.

His work has not gone without its protests...

I was nearly killed recently by a charmed mob, and I heard that Flareon
has been attacked by a player. And there were many times that people
deliberately spammed me until I went link-dead. But I have taken
measures to circumvent this. And then there are the thwappers and
spitters. I've had to learn to look the other way.

Some people say that running a bot ruins the objective of the game.
Rather than players seeking aid from a specific classed character, or
locating an object that has the ability to cast the desired spell, they
seek a bot such as Nelkum.

Really what bots are doing is replacing chat spam and ask spam with room
spam, which I think is a huge improvement. And I think most lowbies agree
that it's nice to know where you can get a spell when you need it.

And my own situation shows that even someone who doesn't have a clue
about how to prepare for being an effective and viable avatar can
manage without levelling spells, and the result is exactly what these
people complain about.

So why continue to run a bot?

Well initially my intent was to use triggers just to cast spells on my
own characters. But then I found that it was actually kind of fun
sitting behind this character and notbotting. In my own definition, a
bot is a character who functions primarily through triggers. This
differs from the textbook definition of a character playing without
actually being attended by anyone. But I like to watch what's going on
even as the triggers are running. You see, the Realms is a fascinating
place. I can't imagine how anyone could be bored here, because I don't
get bored even standing in the same place all the time. But mostly I do
this because it's helpful, and many people seem to appreciate it.

To those who have complained about the spam created by Nelkum and his

I did explain already that I'm replacing chatspam with roomspam. But
I got into a lot of trouble early on because I was botting and I didn't
realize that people didn't like the spam I was generating.

Seemed to me that compared to Darkhaven Square, the Eastern gate was
like way out beyond the boonies. So I wanted to advertise a bit. Just
about then I discovered that nifty alfalfa trigger, It occurred to me
that maybe the people passing by might share some Grey Poupon. I do
love my mustard! For me, the alfalfa and the mustard never seemed to
get old. But because I was botting, I didn't realize that some people,
especially the avatars, had a different opinion. So I thought something
more along the lines of "How are you?" would be better.  But
recently people have convinced me to do away with social triggers when
people enter the room. I guess I did get carried away with that, and I
owe apologies to a lot of people. It's number 38 on my to-do list,
right after number 37, which is to remember where I put the list.

With so many opposed to the idea of botting what can you say?

Am I destroying the Realms by casting helpful spells? Or am I making
the Realms a nicer place? If you hate it, please ignore me. *wipes spit
from eyes* But if you need a spell, say Pretty Please.

Nelkum is located 7 east of Darkhaven Square...

Thanks to all of you for opinions, suggestions and long winded lectures
with your feelings on this issue. And for a bit of personal experience,
I (Kuah) bought some portals from Quaph, (4w,4n,u,2s from DH[]) and had
a few pounds too many to carry all of them, thus I was out 2.5 mil for
not paying attention. Later that day, the owner of Quaph sent me a tell
and was kind enough to of give me a refund. And that gave me another
reminder that there are people, not bots, behind the text on this
screen. Thank you.

Eclipse (part2) By: Shingo

Chapter 2 - Tried and Proven Worthy

Sol and Lune set a course through a small thicket of forest on the way
to a small lake shown on the map.  In the centre of the lake, was built
L'aquis Castle; a castle with towers above water, an entrance at the
surface, and what seemed like several floors built beneath the lake.
The towers were covered with vines of seaweed, and moss, giving it a
nice green colour, which helped to camouflage the castle from invaders,
but also made it tough to spot for people looking for a place to stay.
  Fortunetly, the map proved accurate, and the children had no trouble
finding it.

The drawbridge was up, and a lone guard on the uppermost tower hailed
out to them.

"Hello there!  State your names and your business."

Sol yelled back, "We're from the tribe on the island of Nairite, and
we were sent here by our father to gather information on how we might
prove worthy to become leaders of our tribe.  I am Sol, and this is my
sister, Lune."

"Tribe of Nairite?", the guard yelled, "Then honoured guests you are!
Come in! Lower the drawbridge!".  And the drawbridge slowly creaked down
and landed in front of the children to cross and enter the castle.  The
sight from outside was nothing short of dull, but the inside was amazing.

The walls were built from aquamarine, giving each wall a glistening
blue hue to it.  Each step echoed heavily, resounding off the hollow
walls.  Overhead, was an exquisite chandelier made from coral, with
dangling firewater opals.  On the walls, were several banners with the
crest of the castle, L'aquis.

The guard from the tower appeared from a stairwell in front of them
and greeted the children.

"Welcome, honoured guests.  His Majesty is awaiting your presence.
Come, walk this way", and he led them to a spiral staircase which only
went deeper into the lake.  At the bottom of the staircase, was a
double-door entryway.  The doors were made with coral, reinforced by
magic.  A guard at the doorway opened the doors for the guard and the

They walked into a large chamber, where the walls were actually a thin
sheet of diamond.  The floor as well was diamond, giving clear view of
the depths of the lake around and beneath them.  Schools of fish were
swimming every which way, and some of the citizens of the castle were
having a swim with the tamed water drakes.  Sunlight sparkled in from
the surface of the water and shone thin beams of light into the lake,
giving the lake a dreamy state as fish and waterman alike pierced through
the beams as they swam.  Before the children had time to take in all the
sights, they were introduced to King L'aquis the XI.

"Sire", began the guard, "we have visitors from the Tribe of Nairite.
These are Sol and Lune, the children of the one who fought beside you
years ago."
King L'aquis' eyes widened with both surprise and happiness, as he
slowly began to reminisce of old times.

"Ahh, indeed", began L'aquis, "you are welcome in my Kingdom at any time.
Tell me, how is your father?"

"He is well, your Majesty", said Lune, "and while we both have many
questions to ask of how you know our father, we're here on business.
We've come seeking information on how we can prove ourselves worthy to
lead our tribe, and we were hoping you might be able to lead us in the
right direction."

"Yes, your father did the same many years ago.  And I will do what my
father did to him and to me. I will send my son along with you, as he
too must prove his worth to me to lead our own Kingdom.  L'aquin, come!"

A young looking, blue-skinned man came from behind, decked in a light
blue plate mail, and holding a large spear, tipped with sharpened coral.
He was tall, with small gills behind his ears, though it was barely
noticable with his hair covering up most of it.  He looked like the image
of King L'aquis himself, except much younger.  His sea-green eyes flashed
at Sol and Lune, then quickly returned to face his father, and he
kneeled.  "You have summoned me?", he spoke, his voice low-toned.

"Yes, L'aquin.  You are to accompany these two children from the Tribe
Nairite, to the Dragon's Nest south of the castle.  The time has come
for you to prove your worth to me as a rightful heir to the throne,
and when you return, victorious, no doubt, we will feast and talk of
old times with these two."

L'aquin, seemed shock at the sudden order, but knew that this was what
he was waiting for - the chance to prove he was worthy, except he wasn't
about ready to share the responsibility with two complete strangers.
"Father, I can do this by myself.  I do not need the aid of two innocent
travelers from the isles who might only get into danger."

"Silence!  You have heard my request, and you will heed it.  These two
are no ordinary travelers, I assure you.  If they are anything like their
father, they may, in fact, teach you something, like some humility.  You
will set out this moment, and return with an adult dragon's head before
nightfall.  Dismissed."

The three children bowed, and exited the throne room.  L'aquin turned to
them and said, "I only work with you because my father believes you are
both skilled but if you get into danger, I will not help you, and I
expect you not to help me, though I doubt I'll need it.  We'll leave

They exited the castle and walked south, to the entrance of the Dragon's

There was complete silence as they approached the cave opening.
Stepping in very silently, they couldn't hear much, and they dared not
light a torch for fear that they alert the dragons to their presence.
There was a dripping noise in the back of the cave, water trickling down
a stalactite.  Then there was the sound of footprints scurrying across
the puddle the water was forming, and then a low rumbling.  In what
little light was left, the three children turned to look at each other
before continuing further into the perilous cave.

The rumbling got a bit louder, and along with the light footsteps, could
be heard a small growl; almost a cry.  There was a bend in the cavern
and peeking around it, the children saw 2 dragons, one adult, and one
baby.  There were several small holes in the ceiling of the cave, which
allowed some light to filter in.  The sound of a stream could be heard
above them, and that's where the dripping was coming from.  The cave was
perfect to be raising young; water from above, shelter from the weather
in the cave, and outside, in the forest, there must surely be wild

The children stopped looking from behind the bend and sat on the floor,
backs leaning to the wall.  They weren't sure how they were supposed to
kill the dragon, and especially one that had a child to take care of.

"I say we kill them both.  The young one would only grow up and ravage
forest when it is older.  Kill it now, and it won't be a problem to my
Kingdom in the future", began L'aquin.

"Are you heartless?" asked Lune. "It's only a baby dragon, how could we
kill it when it has a life to live as much as any other wild animal?"

"Have you forgotten that this is my territory, not the island?  When it
grows up, and has young of it's own, it will come back here to feed off
the animals that my Kingdom uses, and destroy the forest.", L'aquin

Let's worry about the young one later.  How do you propose we defeat the
older one?  No doubt she'll fight ferociously to protect her child.", Sol

"Leave that up to me.  You two do whatever you want, but stay out of my

"Why are you being so adamant about doing it yourself?  You'll get hurt",
Sol said.

"That has yet to be seen.  Are we ready to strike?"  Sol and Lune nodded,
each pulling out their weapons.  Lune said, "I think we should..."

"CHARGE!!!" L'aquin yelled, and ran around the bend of the cave towards
the dragons.  The mother perked up and roared so greatly, the caverns
shook,  and dust fell from the ceiling of the cave, some stalactites began
cracking, almost ready to break off and fall to the floor.  Sol and Lune had no
choice but to follow him around.

L'aquin was running full speed towards the mother dragon, and planted
the butt end of his spear into the ground of the cavern and used his
momentum to vault himself up, taking his spear out of the ground as he
was lifted into the air towards the mouth of the mother dragon.  The
young dragon cried out a lesser roar than his mother produced, and
took cover in a small corner of the cave. The mother forgot about
L'aquin, after hearing her baby cry for help, and she roared once more,
with the same effect as before.  Stalactites began dropping from the
cavern ceiling, one landing almost on top of L'aqiun while he was still
vaulting through the air.  Some landed near her child, almost piercing
through him, but some did land on the mother's back, and they stuck
there, red blood began seeping through the mother's scaled back.
L'aquin landed on top of the mother's back, and with his spear
lowered, charged up along her back, towards the neck.  The mother
swung around real fast, throwing L'aquin off her back and into a cavern
wall.  L'aquin slid down the wall, and slumped over, unconscious.
 Then the mother reared up and roared, this time in great pain as those
stalactites had really hurt her, many of them were deeply embedded in
her back.  The cavern shook more violently this time, and instead of
stalactites falling, it seemed like the whole cavern was about to cave in!

"We've got to get out of here!", Sol yelled.  "I'll grab L'aquin, you
take the baby dragon with you!  We can't just leave it here."

"How do you want me to do that?  The baby is as tall as I am, and I don't
think he'd want to leave his dying mother!", Lune cried back.

"I'm sure it doesn't want to die either.  Just do what you can!" Sol
cried, as he ran over to L'aquin's unconscious body and picked him up.
The mother dragon looked at her child, and made a few dying sounds to
it, before it's eyes closed and rocks began to tumble onto her, forcing
her to the ground with a loud crash further causing the cave to crumble
away.  Lune ran over to the crying baby dragon and grabbed one of it's
claws in her hand, and began tugging at it to go with her.  The dragon
instead lowered his head and scooped her up onto his back, then began
making a mad dash towards the exit.

Once everyone was safely out of the cave, they turned back and watched
the entrance cave into itself, sealing up the nest and the remains of
the adult dragon.  The baby cried one last small wail then stood quietly,
with Lune still perched on his back.  Lune carefully dismounted and ran
over to Sol and L'aquin who still lay unconscious.  She drew a rune in
the dust and grabbed some herbs from her straw handbag, sprinkled some
over L'aquin's body, and the herbs disappeared from sight as she began
chanting a spell.  Then, L'aquin's eyes opened.

"What happened?" he asked. "My back feels sore, and what is THAT doing
here?", he said pointing at the baby dragon.

"It saved me, and we saved you", said Lune. "So thank us, because you'd
still be in the cave, dead probably.  Then how would you rule your

L'aquin pondered the turn of events for a moment before saying, "Thank
you. But we still have a problem.  We're not exactly returning with a
dragon's head. We're going back with a live baby dragon, who we
intended to kill, so why did it save you?"

Sol interrupted, "It's mother told it to.  Rather than see it die, it
is still too young to defend itself, and seeing Lune and I as peaceful
people, probably told it to go with us before she died.  We can take
it to L'aquis Castle and maybe you can feed it and watch it grow?"

"Into an animal that would eat my people?  I'd rather not.  But we must
return with it, and we'll see what my father has to say about this."


Back at the castle, they decided to have Lune stay with the baby just
outside the front gate, while Sol and L'aquin entered and spoke with
the King.
  "So you've returned not with a dragon's head, but with a whole dragon?"
asked King L'aquis.  "And this dragon is outside my castle with your
sister, Sol?"

"Yes, your Majesty.  We'd like to ask that you take care of the dragon.

It's mother entrusted it's care to us, but we can't handle such a large
animal.  At least here, in can hunt in the forest, or in the lake."

"Then I've already made my decision.  The dragon, with proper handling,
could become a valuable asset to my Kingdom.  We will take care of it
here.  And I hope you've learned a lesson, L'aquin.  If it weren't for
these two, you would be lost to us.  This is the experience that I
believe has taught you to rely on the help of others if you cannot do
it alone, and only you can be the judge of that, so I hope you judge
more carefully next time."

"Yes, father", said L'aquin, and bowed.

"Ah ha!  Good!  For now, let us feast!  It's been a long time since
I've had visitors from Naerite, and you and Lune have much to explain
to me, as I have much to explain to you!"

To be continued

Meet Hoerkin By: Begaria

I took the opportunity to see if Hoerkin was available for an interview
and to see if he would take some time out of his busy schedule for an
interview.  He happily agreed after a few minutes and I was brought
before him.  I smiled at him and said that if he was ready. He nodded
and I told him that we shall begin.

Begaria: How long have you been playing Realms, Hoerkin?

Hoerkin: I started playing in the beginning of 98, so just over
2 years :)

Begaria: Was Realms your very first MUD, or did you play at different
ones before you came here?

Hoerkin: This is the first, and only, MUD I ever evil
brother inticed me here, and I was hooked at the first line of text.

Begaria: Heh, when you started here, were you a helpless newbie? Or did
you catch on to this pretty quick and shoot off into the glory of the

Hoerkin: I would say I was a mixture of both.  I had the basis down
pretty well, having been brought up in the time of Infocom games (Zork,
Hitchhikers Guide...) but it took me a while to get a firm grasp on

Begaria: After playing for awhile, did you ever think that you would
become an Imm?

Hoerkin: That's a hard one...after playing for a time, 6 months or so,
I think...I knew that I wanted to Build  :) I downloaded a copy of
SmaugWiz and learned as much as I could. After a year of playing with
that, I knew I was really interested in Imming here :)

Begaria: When you Imm'd, did you go right on into building and find
it easy?

Hoerkin: Pretty much, yep.  There is still a lot to learn here...there
are many differences between Building here, and Building on a personal
copy of SmaugWiz.

Begaria: When you were a mortal, I know that you belonged to the Guild
of Rangers because I joined just before you Imm'd. Do you have any
great memories from the guild?

Hoerkin: Hmm...well, there was this time when Ranstlin and I were
goofing off at recall, and I went to use the bind social on him...
and ended up cuffing him instead.

Begaria: And that turned into a pkill?

Hoerkin: Well...Attacker Flag, anyhow I can't recall who showed up to
break us up...Phred, I believe.

Begaria: Did Ranstlin get you back?

Hoerkin: Ranstlin has gotten me back ever since...and before... he's a

Begaria: Was it a hard decision for you to leave the guild and become
an Imm? Any regrets?

Hoerkin: It was quite a decision, yes.  I knew that I wanted this but my
heart has always been in the GoR. I know the Guild is in good hands,
though, so I don't have many regrets at all :)

Begaria: What's the funniest thing you ever saw as an Imm?

Hoerkin: Most of them, I am not at liberty to discuss...But if you give
me a minute, I'll think of something :) Ok, I'm going to get smited for
mentioning this, I'm sure, but I remember a day when someone inventive
was playing around in Pre-Auth and created several clones of the other
Imms. All chaos ensued, but it was all good fun :)

Begaria: Was that when all the imms were renamed?  Those were clones?

Hoerkin: No.  Names like IIiana and EIisabet...(the lower-case L's are
capital I's...)

Begaria: Can we have a sneak peek at some Hoerkin made areas that are
to come?

Hoerkin: I'm not able to discuss much about my current area, but I will
speak of one which I consider a pet project. I have an abandoned city
in mind, which comes alive only at night...various nasties to face, and
tons of secrets.

Begaria: Do you have any words of wisdom for the rest of the Realms?

Hoerkin: Sure  :)  One thing I can never stress enough is this:
There are Help Files for virtually _everything_ in this game...
by looking for the resources, one is able to be totally self-sufficient.
It's all out there, it's just a matter of taking the time to look :)

Begaria: Thank you for answering my questions Hoerkin.

Hoerkin You're welcome.

Quest and Contest By: Elisabet

    Attention all Golden Ticket Holders! Elisabet will be holding
    a quest for all her golden ticket holders on Thursday, July 20 at
    8pm EST. The Golden Tickets must say they are from Elisabet!

The following are the winners of the last Immortal story Archive Quest
held by Elisabet. Congrats again to Nimby and Ilsensine

To the tune of American Pie By: Nimby
A long long time ago
Elisabet can remember when
Spirit Nagas made her cry.
But she knew if she held her ground
And worked to get her spell list down
Those silly dwarven toddlers would die
But Pixie Forest made her shiver
With every 'cause light' she delivered
She needed better E Q
Whatever would she do?
She can't remember if she sighed
When zapped by a cloak of elvenkind
But something touched her brutal side
The day a gnome child died
So fly, fly, miss Elisabet, fly
Though now you be a goddess
You were once a small fry
And all those mobs you now just look at and sigh
Upon a time they could make you cry
Upon a time they could make you die
Oh did you try the Swordsman's gloves
And drink a thick black potion
When you were shivering and ill?
And did you believe the electrum sword
Was better than the elven one
and did you venture east of Gallow Hill?
Well I'm sure you wore a bullette shield
And a silver dagger you did wield
And you got a bracelet of gold
From Arabella's grave so cold
And while Tree of Life caused you distress
You donned Inanna's big Headdress
And I'm sure that you adepted Bless
Before you were too old
So bye bye Miss Elisabet, fly
Though now you be a goddess you were once a small fry
And all those mobs you now so easily smite
Upon a time they could make you cry
Upon a time they could make you die.
I went down to the Courier Store where I'd bought a note or 2 before
And I took a quill in hand.
And I wrote these simple lines, mostly just to pass some time
And do a quest throughout the land
And though this note I'm sure won't win
I hope at least to get a grin
From the immortal Elisabet when
Oh when, she reads the note

Cersei the Darklord By: Ilsensine
Lady Cersei tentatively entered the foreboding castle. Since the evil
lord had descended on Darkhaven, only those that wished death dared to
enter Darkhawk. Cersei came with another purpose. The tyrant could not
be defeated by might or magic, for many had tried and failed. She knew
another way. The fortress was not what she expected, not a guard in
sight and a flow of gentle music drifted from the great northern hall.
Cersei lightly crossed the circular red carpet and gasped aloud as she
entered the room. There sat the tyrant. Resplendent in a crimson robe,
on a golden throne he perched, attention focussed on a chessboard upon
the table before him. He looked up from his game and brought his
intense purple orbs upon her. 'Who disturbs my repose?' he boomed, as
with a gesture his chess servant was dismissed. Cersei swallowed hard,
trying to relax her racing mind on the sweet music from the courtier's
silver flute, rather than upon the skeletal hand resting on the table
as it spun an incandescent blue stone through its bony fingers.
Straightening, she spoke in a clear and sure tone, 'I have come to
take the challenge of the mind.' The robed figure eased back in his
throne, 'Excellent,' he purred, 'do take a seat.' Wordlessly, she
accepted the invitation, placing herself in the carved chair opposite
the monster. The musician departed at that moment and momentarily the
only sound in the chamber was a faint twinkle from her pretty gold and
black Solacian earrings.

'The rules are simple,' he flatly denoted, 'I have but a single riddle,
solve this and you may kill me by my own sword, the only weapon which
could even cut my skin.' Smiling smugly, he produced a ruby sabre and
set it upon the walnut table. The rubies shone deep like port wine and
the wicked edge whispered to of death to the beautiful lady. Cersei
sat pinned, trying to control her fear.

'In marble halls, white as milk,
A perfect prison, soft as silk,
In a fountain, crystal clear,
A golden apple doth appear
No doors lead into this hold
Yet thieves break in to steal the gold.'

She let her mind empty of attendant thought and played the words over in
her mind... deep breaths... perfect calm... cool... natural... oval...
what was she thinking of? Natural, calm, oval, golden apple... of course!
No doors, clear liquid, a golden centre! She took a breath and spoke at
last, 'An Egg.' Those two words fell like dead petals from her lips.

Disbelief entered his purple orbs and a clawed hand jerked up to push
the sword to her. In a dream the lady took the hilt and raised the
blade. As the tyrant bowed his head she brought the great weapon down
upon his brow. A crackle of thunder rolled and echoed from the figure,
etched with a single, pained, 'Noooo!' She felt the sword melt like
butter in her hand and without turning she fled from the crumbling

The earth shook and a great crevasse opened before her. Leaping
desperately, she flung herself over the divide and landed in a heap of
disbelief at the other side. Turning back she saw a small black crow
fly free of the rubble.

To this day Cersei swears it had the strangest purple eyes.

Once again, GREAT JOB by Nimby and Ilsensine

Turalyon sleeps with the Tuna fishies. By: Begaria

The story begins high in the Vallenwood Tree, the very top of the
Guild of Ranger's HQ where Reol is sitting on the highest branch,
looking out towards the great city of Darkhaven.  He looked out
towards the east and saw a speck far off in the distance.  It came
closer and closer to Reol until it crashed and stuck right into the
branch in front of him.
It was an arrow with a message on it. Shaking his head, Reol stood up
and carefully made his way to the arrow and pulled it out of the
branch.  He sat back down and unrolled the message.  Inside were some
cool looking shades and words on the paper that said, 'PUT THE SHADES
ON.'  Reol shrugged and threw away the paper and put the arrow down
beside him.  He put the shades onto his eyes and a message popped in
through the eye holes magically.
A voice started to speak to Reol.
Voice: 'Good morning Mr.Reol.  You have been assigned a new task as the
head of the hired assassin program. If you choose to accept this
mission, your task goes as follows. You are to retrieve the mystical
Namsar's Sacrificial Fish Scaler and to hunt down and take Turalyon,
lord of all Tuna fishies, to the hidden pond of the Tuna fishies. There,
you will dispose of Turalyon and put his body into the pond where he
will be with his beloved Tuna Fishies.  Don't forget to bring some home,
those things taste great. You are allowed to take two accomplices with
you.  If you are caught and killed during this mission, the board will
deny to have anything to do with you and disknowledge your existence.
This message will self-destruct...

Reol sighed and took off the glasses and threw them off the tree. As
he did, they blew up in mid-air.  Reol looked out towards the city and

Later that day, Reol packed some heals and his equipment and set off on
through the south gate and proceeded down the path to the Coral Reef
beach.  Reol came down onto the sand and quickly cast the aqua breath
spell.  Reol proceeded into the water with confidence and dived down
into the depths.  There, he swam through the tunnels until he came to
the dark caverns of the slippery eels.  He tracked through the many
strenuous tunnels until he came to Namsars secret base.  Reol opened the
door to little hut and found Namsar swimming around his living room,
chasing after a big fish with his Scaler. Reol just floated there
watching this humorous scene when Namsar finally gave up chasing the
stupid fish and noticed Reol.  Namsar nodded and they both proceeded to
swim towards each other.  Reol stopped in front of Namsar.
Reol 'Havin' a little trouble?'
Namsar grumbled 'Bah, just a little hungry that's all.  What do I owe
to this little visit, Reol?'
Reol 'I have a new mission assigned to me Namsar.  I am to dispose
of Turalyon and I need your special Sacrificial Fish Scaler to do it.'

Namsar nodded and said 'Yeah, sure.  Just you have anything
to eat?'
Reol was prepared for this.  He pulled out a magic mushroom and gave it
to Namsar.  Namsar wulfed it down in one chew and thanked Reol.
Reol 'Ya know, you DO have the create food spell.'
Namsar nodded and said 'Yeah I know, I ran out of mana though and I got
Reol chuckled and Namsar handed him his Sacrificial Fish Scaler and Reol
shaked Namsar's hand and started to leave.
Namsar 'Hey Reol, just use my staircase.'
Reol 'huh?'
Namsar took Reol to the back and showed him a staircase that led right
up to guild recall.  Reol felt kind of stupid for not remembering that
he could have just used the staircase to get here.  Namsar started to
laugh at Reol when Reol told him to be quiet and left.
Reol now needed two partners.  Any two will do, Reol thought.
That's when Lothus jumped down from above.  Lothus landed on his
feet with a thud and nodded at Reol.  Reol grinned to himself.
Lothus 'Hey Reol, wassup?'
Reol 'Nothing much.  Hey you want to help me with something?'
Lothus shrugged and said sure and followed Reol.  Reol climbed
out of the tree and landed right on Jaryl's head. Jaryl pushed him
off and got up and dusted himself off.

Reol 'Hey!  You're alive!  Thought the Tarrasque did you in!'
Jaryl shook his head 'Nope.  Managed to climb out of there with my
life.  Heard this evil laugh coming from the entrance of the caves
Reol grinned 'Hey, want to help me with something?'
Jaryl 'Yeah, sure, got nothin else to do...except for to murder Begaria.'
Reol 'Nope, that's not my mission.  I have to dispose of Turalyon.'
Jaryl 'Why?'
Reol '..............I dun know.  Just got a message I had to do it.'
Jaryl shrugged and followed Reol.
Lothus 'So what's the plan?'
Reol 'I wait here for Turalyon.  You two go hide and when I say 'now'
you two jump him and throw this sack over him.'
Reol handed a potato sack to Lothus and some binds to Jaryl.
Lothus and Jaryl climbed up the vallenwood and waited for Reol's signal.
Reol stood there on the path, waiting with professional assassin like
calm. A smell of Tuna fishies started to float into Reol's nose as
Turalyon appeared up ahead.  Reol put on his most disarming smile and
waited for Turalyon.

Reol 'Hey Tura.  Wassup?'

Turalyon 'Nothing much.  Whatcha doin'?'
Reol 'Nothing much right NOW!'
Lothus and Jaryl lunged out of the tree.  Jaryl quickly binded
Tura and Lothus stuffed him into the sack.
Turalyon 'Hey!  What's going on here!'
Reol 'From orders of the assassin board, I have to carry out your
Turalyon's muffly cried 'What did I do?!'
Reol '.........I dun know.  Just that you have to die.'
Whimpering came from inside the sack. Poor Tura, thought Reol
but he had to carry out his orders.  The three of them picked up
the sack and started down the many trails towards the Tuna fishy
pond.  It would be too long to describe the paths, besides, it's
a secret. The three of them quickly threw the sack into the pond,
and Reol unsheathed the mystical Namsars Sacrificial Fish Scaler and
ninja threw it at the sack.  The knife stuck right in the middle of
it and Tura's cries were no more.  Reol sighed and felt a little sad
towards his friend, but just then, a white light flashed down on
the sack and a BIG Tuna Fish popped out from it.
Tuna 'Thank you for releasing me from that human body Reol.  For
your efforts, I will grant you one wish.'
Reol 'One wish?  If there's one wish that I would make, it would
be for the Realms benefit.'

Funny Bones By: Kuah,Dein,Shingo and Begaria

Funny Titles

Taboo. Making The World A Bitter Place.
Louge Smiter Of Those Either Smoten or Smoteable.
Cloveious the phandi that huggled Balzhur.
Vladith wanders in a dazed, zombie-like state is hovering here.
Thoric:  Lost Mind.  Reward.
Darklund Is Easily Distracted By Bright Shiny Things.
Jsinth Emberhammer is config -brain
Sigwulf wishes he was on Buffy...erm with Buffy
Sylvias I'Arahinsnugglewuggums, the Greater Lemon Summoner.
Rosin: Wholesome part of your mother's breakfast.
Kuah Cha'Din, cooks as good as he looks.
Qizatch has belladonna sticking out of its mouth.
Saraphin teaches you a lesson -- Pokey style!
Traxxis is in the neverending search for French bootie.
Drathkkyn Wants His Title To Be In The Cry Of Despair :P.
Deuce Bigalow, Male Gigolo: Potion Holding Man-Whore.

Avatar Chat...
Merton 'You recite a magical tablet...50 dr   50 hr  5 dex 1000 hp
Anti-Merton  *sniff*

Merton 'One day Herne will make one of those'

Symposium Counciltalk
Kolad counciltalks 'oh sorry about my absentness i was in traffic.... :('
Cresis counciltalks 'Playing, I hope.'

Ogrillon Exposed!

Today I'm down in Gauntlet where I have just rescued the Ogrillon from
imprisonment. I made a deal with the old fellow today, I'd free him
if and only if he would answer a few of my questions. Fearing it would
take days for another adventurer to find him, he agreed, and we are very
glad he did.
Dein: Thank you for answering my questions today.
Ogrillon: I didn't have much choice in the matter now, did I? Ya bribed
me, remember?
Dein: Ummmmm....anyways, how does it feel to rule Gauntlet?  To be the
master of evil for lowbies?
Ogrillon: It's busy, I'll tell you that. When some upstart adventurer
isn't trying to kill me I'm either trapped or writing in my ledger.
Dein: Your ledger?
Ogrillon: Yes, being owner of this place isn't fun you know. I have
ogres camped outside my walls and the taxes must get paid. It's actually
quite difficult.

I remember earlier days when the Sentinel was not well known, back then
it was relaxing, I had to spend less time defending myself and more
time enjoying myself.
Dein: One thing I have always wondered, why does the Sentinel unlock
your castle?
Ogrillon: Years before I forced out the previous owner of the Sentinel.
that was a fight to remember all right....many were killed.
However, I've always been meaning to get the lock changed but I've never
had the time to do so.
Dein: Are there a lot more things you do if you had the time?
Ogrillon: But of course, obviously you haven't seen enough of this place.
The ant infestation is just horrid, and you'd think an exterminator
would come out here, but no, of course not, not when the Ogrillon needs
Dein: I always pictured you as big and scary, but you don't seem scary
at all...
Ogrillon: That's a misrepresentation. I don't even want to hurt people.
On the other hand have you met the ogre chieftain's daughter? That girl
is feisty! And what a violent one too.  Personally, I would rather just
thank someone for saving me and then leave. The less I have to do, the
Dein: Are there any funny moments you remember that you'd like to share?
Ogrillon: Well, it's not really funny, but I remember someone came to
kill me, and he brought a charmed rabbit along with him. Now this player
looked very buff, yet I killed him.  However as soon as he was dead, the
bunny got me.

Public Submitted Works By: Public Submitted Works
**This was a submission in Elisabets last Quest with the immortal
**story, it was not a winner, but she felt it too good not to post!

The Story of Cadimus, by Vaile

Rising from the mists of time, a relic from ages long ago, the sword of
Chalra has once again been discovered.  The honorable of the known
realm have become completely infatuated with thoughts of knowledge,
power, and glory.  Many have begun their travels in search for the
legendary sword only to fall to a demise visited upon them by the
unknown.  One such adventurer, known as Cadimus to the populace, a
fighter of reknown, undertakes a journey into the farthest lands upon
Having thought he could overcome any evil or darkness that might arise
to face him, finding himself in the fortress of the Dread Lord changed
all of his thoughts of conquering anything.  His thoughts only on
survival.  Unknown to him though, the only way in which to uncover the
secrets to the sword, are to not be in search of it.  Rather, it is
the sword that seeks to discover the one, the only true one.
Fighting for his life through beings from the beyond.  Foremost besting
the horrible form of a golem named Onyx.  Struggling for survival, the
Golem not showing any signs of defeat, Cadimus slowly begins to fall
prey to his own limits.  Nearing the end of his strength, Cadimus is
suddenly aware of Onyx's lifeless form in a heap upon the floor of the

Falling against a wall, he breaths deeply afraid of the future and
thankful for being alive, his last thought, What is to come next?, and
at that moment he falls into slumber, his dreams of darkness brought
upon by the evil surrounding him.  Waking, his body somewhere he had
never seen nor heard of, he sets off through the hall.  Desolate and
dark, surprise settles into his mind as he discovers a doorway leading
into a dreary yet not dark room.  A being, frail of body and soul,
stands chained to the wall moaning softly.  Cadimus is beckoned to come
forward, the frail prisoner saying softly that no harm will come to him,
that he only wishes to aid his travels.
Lifting his head slowly, and strolling wearily over to the prisoner,
he feels relaxed and revived, his armor glowing softly and feeling
stronger wrapped around his body.  Smiling and giving thanks to the
prisoner, who states his name as James, unshackles his wrists and sets
him free.  Feeling stronger, in health and in mind, Cadimus begins his
journey once again, this time only with the thoughts of escaping and
surviving.  Finding himself lost once again, darkness suddenly looms
from all around, surrounding him with an eerie feel of death ahead.
As Cadimus wanders blindly around, he recalls a name he once read long
ago in a book.  The name, The Abyss.  Darkness begins crushing the
essence of life from his body, lifting him off the stone beneath his feet.

This darkness is unlike any he's ever felt before, finding his way
quickly becoming impossible.  The gloom begins to take form, horrid
screams filling the noiseless air as the form quickly envelopes Cadimus.
Swirling his ineffective sword around, he finds himself slowly falling
into despair.  The darkness begins to slowly dissipate as his soul
does.  Then, the darkness is gone, leaving Cadimus once again in the
quiet of the corridor, the only differ ence being a towering Pentacle
standing before him.  Reaching up, his body racked in pain, he feels
himself shriveling and then he feels a difference.  A grand hallway
stands before him.  Slowly striding forward, he comes upon a door.
Intricate carvings upon the frame slowly disappear as the door swings
open.  Flowing in, he finds himself faced with the Dread Lord himself,
quickly sliding to one side, he finds his hand resting upon a sword,
lifting it high, he destroys Seth in a single blow, at that point
immortality fills his soul...